Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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