we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
