the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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