No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
