love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
