i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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