You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
