I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just gift wrapped bread.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
