Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Randomize