and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
