Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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