I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
