And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
