we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
