I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
You've changed since you got that strap on
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
