i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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