Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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