Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize