i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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