Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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