doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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