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i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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