just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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