The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
