do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize