I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
