There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
