I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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