I don't remember. Are we still dating?
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Randomize
