I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
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he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
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And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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