Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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