So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
and you fell through a lawn chair
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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