Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Michael Bay diarrhea
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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