And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
