We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
