I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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