can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
