Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
