i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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