All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
We had to coat check the pizza.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Randomize
