I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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