if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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