i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
