We're facebook friends in real life
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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