I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize