Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
