Your face is a jimmy john
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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