even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
