just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
True strength comes from lack of pants
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
