I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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