There was a lot of him and a little penis
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
