her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
where am i from again
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a blind-side dick pic.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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