every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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